As predicted, yesterday was a great day. Also as predicted, I have photos to prove it.
Addison Rose decided to show up a week early! She was born at 12:01pm and weighed 6 pounds and 14 ounces. I will never forget the look on my brother's face when he held her up to the window for all of us to see. I've only seen him with that look one other time - when he held Banana up to the same window three years ago. So sweet.
So now I've got to come up with a blog name for Addison...hmm...I think I will wait to see what her personality is like. Something will stick eventually.
I spent the morning with Banana and got her back to the hospital just in time to see her new sister. She was so adorable with her..."Hello! I wuv you." And "We wuv you, baby, We wuv you." It was an exhausting day for me - hanging out with a three year old who needed a nap (notice my frazzled look in the first photo), but I've got some great quotes and photos for scrapping because of it. She's a funny girl. Plus she always makes me feel pretty. "Aunt Mandy, I wike your hair. It's cute." "Aunt Mandy, I wike your wipstick. It's sparkly." "Aunt Mandy, I wike your bracewet. It's pretty."
Of course Banana and Smudge both were terribly concerned that their Uncle PJ wasn't there. Sometimes I wonder if Smudge realizes I'm the one who found PJ. She needs to be thanking me for that rather than giving me a hard time whenever I show up without him. Bobbie Jo threatened to go see PJ at one point in the day, and Banana was none too happy about it. "He's MY PJ," she said. "You can't go see him."
There's nothing like a newborn to get you thinking about the whole circle of life and what all is good or bad or indifferent about our world. It's a huge thing to wrap your mind around, and I spent the drive back home last night thinking of how incredibly fortunate and blessed I really am...and how this little girl now has all of this opportunity and love and precious time ready for the taking; ready for the living. That whole train of thought came at the perfect time for me. I've spent the last few weeks very anxious, depressed, angry, and you name it about my mother and her seemingly declining physical, emotional and mental state. I haven't talked about it or written about it much because I'm not sure what's what with her and just that aspect alone is so frustrating and maddening to me that I try to not go there unless absolutely necessary. I have this huge fear that if I start crying, I will never stop. So I don't let myself head in that direction. At least not for now.
It's called "denial." And it's a beautiful thing.
Addison Rose, if you find yourself reading this one day, know that you are loved. Loved beyond measure. And know that you showed up just when we needed you most.