My brother's youngest child was born just six weeks before my mom died. In the post I wrote the day after she was born I mentioned the whole "circle of life" concept and how Addison was reminding me that my life is good despite the fact that my mom was sick. I didn't know, obviously, when I wrote it that I would soon have to try to actually believe it and understand it...not to mention, live it. Addison as well as my other nieces have been a source of strength and comfort for me during this time - something to hold on to, something to hope for. Their bright faces and funny comments remind me of our youth and give me reason to believe that they will also have good lives...direct results of the love our mom had for us.
And then this happened...
About six weeks after my mom died, my sister called me at work one day and asked what kind of mood I was in. Seems she wanted to tell me something. "I'm gonna have a baby," she said, "and I know everyone's gonna be mad at me."
Mad at you?
She found out she was pregnant the same week my mom died. This will be Sissy's 4th child. She is 41 years old, and the single mom of three children already. Her oldest child lives with his dad, and the two girls live with her. Sissy struggles to make ends meet with very little help from her ex-husband. Although she has been seeing this baby's father for a good while, none of us have met him, and she says she isn't going to marry him. So...with all of that in mind, I was a little freaked out by the news of a new baby. Freaked out only because I worry about her. I have worried about her all my life, though. I worry about everyone. It's what I do.
But I wasn't mad at her.
Some folks are mad at her. As if she's doing something to them personally. And some folks have seen fit to express their anger by ranting and raving and calling her names. (And those are the adults I'm talking about.)
The thing about Sissy, though, is this: She always survives and she never seems to worry about herself or her situation nearly as much as the rest of us do. She's warm and loving and forgiving almost to a fault. She has this uncanny ability to just be happy with what she's got and muddle through what life has dealt her. I love watching her with her children - she's completely entertained by them, and affectionate in ways that our mom never was with us. And although I am completely frustrated with her carefree attitude on a regular basis, that attitude tops the list of the many reasons I love her so.
And so, back to the circle of life. Meet Hank. He will be here in July...whether you are mad about it or not. And excuse me, but how can anyone look at this and be anything other than in love?