The price of anything is the amount of life
you exchange for it.
Henry David Thoreau
I picked that up off of Stacy Julian's blog today. It seems to fit the theme of my discussions with doctors and my therapist that I had today. You know those type discussions where they go on and on about how I really have to reduce the amount of stress in my life? And I go on and on about how easy that would be if everyone would just leave me the hell alone? And then they come back with all of these ways for me to NOT react to the crazy makers in my world? And I walk away wondering why I care so much about work anyway? And then I remember that oh yeah, I have bills to pay?
So anyway, did I have a day off today? Because it doesn't feel like I had a day off today. It feels like I spent the day trying to patch up all of the leaks in my psyche...and believe me, that's exhausting work. One doctor did point out to me that there are reasons I might be tired and irritable and starting to creep down the rabbit hole. Like a) we just moved, b) I had MAJOR surgery just a few months ago, c) I had a blood clot in my lungs a few months ago, and d) I now take a blood thinner that can make one more tired. Oh, and returning to work way too early after going through b, c and d doesn't exactly make for a nice recovery. And then moving on top of that? Well, that's just plain ridiculous.
And then there's this whole other issue...more delightful discussions from my day off....I've known for a couple of years now (after some tests with a fertility specialist) that it was coming, but now it looks as though menopause is officially here. And yes, it's early. And no, I don't want to talk about it right now. But, it's happening. And I think that this whole process (I was told several times today that it's a process not an event, thank you) is going to require some medication adjustments...unless I want to lose every friend I currently have.
Back to the quote - I really don't want to exchange my life for work. I have got to get a grip on how to throw that elephant. Speaking of Throwing the Elephant, I need to get some sleep so I will be better fit for that challenge tomorrow. TTFN.